There’s a Pattern Here

In my family, it’s a running joke that you have to marry in to be a man. We laugh about it every time, but behind the humor is something real: our family is a world of women. I grew up surrounded by strong, resilient women, but their brokenness often ran just as deep as their strength. They’ve shaped my life in ways I’m still uncovering, from my mom and sister to my aunt, my cousin, and her daughters. These women have taught me about love, resilience, and faith—but they’ve also shown me the struggles that can quietly pass from one generation to the next.

Here’s the truth about growing up in a family like mine: you don’t just wrestle with your own struggles. You see theirs too. You see the quiet pain they carry, the generational curses that creep into the fabric of your family tree. In my family, some of those curses are hard to miss. We’ve always had a tendency to avoid confronting problems, as if ignoring them will make them go away. Fear of rejection runs deep, and low self-worth mingles with that fear, creating a tangled mess that shapes how we see ourselves and how we navigate the world.

I’ve watched this pattern play out in so many ways—in relationships, in choices, in moments of silence when we should have spoken up. And it breaks my heart. But it also pushes me to dig deeper, to figure out why we are the way we are and how God can heal what feels so broken.

Recognizing these patterns hasn’t been easy. There have been moments when the weight of it all has felt like too much—times when I’ve been crushed under the realization of how deeply these struggles run in my family. But those moments have also been transformative. They’ve driven me to my knees in prayer, asking God to break the chains that have held us back for generations.

Prayer has become my battle cry. I pray for healing, for redemption, for a breaking of the cycles that have caused so much pain. I ask God to root out the insecurity, the fear, and the feelings of unworthiness that have kept us stuck. And as I pray, I’ve seen Him begin to work—not just in me, but in the women I love so deeply.

This journey hasn’t just changed how I see my family—it’s changed how I see my purpose. Growing up surrounded by these women has given me a heart for others who feel the same struggles. I’ve felt what it’s like to wrestle with low self-worth, to make choices that reflect pain instead of confidence. I’ve seen it in myself, in my mom, in my sister, and even in the young girls who are just beginning to navigate life.

That’s why my heart beats for women’s ministry. God has called me to speak life where lies have taken root, to remind women that their worth isn’t tied to their mistakes or their past. I want to help others see that God’s plans for them are bigger than the pain they’ve carried and the choices they’ve made.

This isn’t just about my family anymore—it’s about every woman who’s ever felt “less than.” It’s about breaking the chains that have held us back and stepping into the freedom God has for us.

To the women in my family, and to every woman reading this, I want you to hear this: You are loved. You are seen. You are enough. God’s grace is more than enough to carry you through whatever you’re facing. Together, we can take the first steps toward healing. We can face the past without fear and walk into the future with hope.

Breaking generational curses isn’t easy, but it’s possible. It starts with one prayer, one decision, one small step at a time. It starts with you.